Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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