Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
i believe in u and ur pee
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
