walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
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I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
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I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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