how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize