the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
