i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize