i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
