I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize