good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
