Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are two peas in an std pod
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize