where does the pee come out of this thing
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Randomize