No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
