My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
that may or may not have been my penis.
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