Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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