Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
