i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Drunk is not a location!
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize