Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
