My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
