If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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