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My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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