No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
