I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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