I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
