For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
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Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
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I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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