I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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