so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
As shirtless as possible
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
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