i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.