I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
