craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
