thus making me awesome and them whores
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
