Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
