She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
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