Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
