Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
MIDGETS
????
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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