Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Randomize
