And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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