belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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