But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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