a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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