3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.