I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
