Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
