forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I've blown a few things in my day
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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