But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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