My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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