He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
