my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize