**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
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