SEEEEXXX PLEASE
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
