just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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