The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize