Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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